all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
drunk pissing on my closed toilet lid is actually quite a sobering experience
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i don't know man, last time i saw her she was applying sunblock to her vagina
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
I come bearing gifts of whiskey and vagina
You're the Michael Phelps of my vagina. Most decorated Fuckolympian of all time.
Am I going to be on condom boxes?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
I have a weird question... did you bite my back last night?
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