the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
Hey guess what I got for Valentine's day? Debt and blue balls.
I tried douching with a turkey baster. Not the brightest idea.
sorry i couldnt make it to your birthday last night. i admit i chose being a whore over you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she named my penis "gigantor the baby arm"
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
Ive seen him cuddling a giant inflatable seahorse. Nothing could be creepier than that.
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
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