it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
On a scale of "impaired judgement" to "Mel Gibson," how drunk are you?
Toaster
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
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its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
Someone's having a good night if they're getting gummi bears and Astroglide.
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
I don't know. I just thought I'd put my drinks in my bag and go on an adventure. Like a drunk Bilbo Baggins.
You said that when your ex gave you a blowjob her mouth was like velvet
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moral of the story: if your going to mix ambien and free skyclub alcohol, take a direct flight or have a layover in a city you wouldn't mind having to return to for a court date.
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
Okay. Did I say I did anything unusual? Because I usually do weird stuff. Did I clean mirrors? My mirrors are really clean, and I think I remember having windex..
It was some weird herd predator-evasion instinct. All 15 of us took off running in different directions, and the two cops just stood there, perplexed. They had no idea who to chase.
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
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