I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
so she called me drunk and made me stay on the phone with her while she puked.
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
I felt kinda bad after screaming 'ITS MY BIRTHDAY TOO' while he was having a seizure in the front of the party bus.
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
I'm really good at handling things like foreskin and speech impediments.
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
I gave you the craziest sex experiences of your life, the least you could do is let me keep the sweater.
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
When my parents ask, do you think "he was the cop I gave head to in order to get out of a speeding ticket" will suffice as to how we met?
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
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