I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
don't thank me. stop putting your penis in foreign objects.
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
we managed to turn Dream Phone into a drinking game. don't hate.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Rubbed one out while on hold to buy tickets to Disneyland. Feel simultaneously like a freak and strangely productive.
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
I think I'm going to go into my next therapy session with hot client with my fly down and when he tells me about it I'm going to say "how did that happen?!" and then porn music will start to play.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Emergency nipple ring removal:vodka, tweezers, and vodka. Can you bring me a band-aid?
My breasts were aching with rage.
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
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