Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
you started putting condoms on anything with a point, then you were yelling at the lamp for using your last condom...
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I love you. Happy valentines. Satin Patricks dayyyyyyyyyy. Alreadythrew up. Geeeeerait.
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
Would you be mad if I just used the argument "I'm allowed to say that, my best friend is a lesbian"?
Never. I'm proud to help you win arguments.
Did you know there is a guy on the porch, wrapped in your snuggie, singing no woman no cry and drinking wine coolers?
I was just asked by a police officer to not come back to Lancaster...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm texting you know although you won't get this until you wake up. the only reason you are strapped to your bed is because you were trying to fly out your window.
So drunk last night I reviewed my recent anazon purchase of secret deodorant. Trust me, it was eloquent.
You claimed that someone else had vomited underneath you/on your hand
you were very insulted that we didn’t believe you that someone else vommed
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
He’s only in town today and our afternoon sex sesh kept getting interrupted by the neighbor’s kid yelling and screaming in the pool
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize