I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
Apparently he's taking the slut he cheated on me with on a cruise for her birthday. THAT COULD HAVE BEEN ME. TITANTIC STYLE.
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
"The cab driver felt bad for us so he stopped to buy us chocolates. That counts as a valentine!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Saying someone's good at giving head is like saying someone is good at pouring juice like there is that one girl who will spill it everywhere but for the most part it's not that hard to be good at
Just cried to my husband about how much I'm going to miss my boyfriend... Maybe marriage is going to work for me after all
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
Do you lock your house? Serious question, I need to know if I can add it to my list of emergency poop stops
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
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