Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
I caught a rooster roaming Edison Park then released it in the bar. They made me try to catch it again and somebody played the chicken dance while I chased it
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I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
It felt like he was juggling my kidneys with the head of his penis... If you could even call it that, it was more like a lochness monster. Huge and mythical.
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i decided this morning while eating my breakfast of red bull and cold pizza that i should take a vow of celibacy
Someone just walked into the bar with a pillow
I don't know whether to judge him or give him a high five
I don't know if your celebrity crush has ever asked you for nudes, but it's fucking awesome
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
The weekend was a blur. There was vodka and penises and orgasms. I played a game of Cock Roulette and won big
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
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