it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
What kind of gift says: "I love you because you're my mom & I'm obligated to, but I don't like you" ?
That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home.
This is going to ruin my future wedding planner career, but isn't it better the groom knows he's gay BEFORE he gets married?
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
Are you in a position where you can bring me some nachos?
We could just go to Vegas and celebrate my singlehood and not contributing to the population.
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
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