saw a man at the beach in a red speedo. when he rolled over he unintentionally displayed a HUGE skid mark.
I just watched my mom open a wine bottle with an electric drill. I have never been so proud.
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
Oh you have a half-brother? Why that's right up my alley! Let's cause family strife
Tearing families apart since 2011.
Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My arms are still sore. Apparently, lube wrestling is the best workout ever.
Got laid in my rudolph onesie for the second year in a row. New tradition? Absolutely.
I'LL COME GET YOU. GOTTA FIND A SUIT THAT COVERS TIT BRUISES FIRST.
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
my favorite part of this morning was sitting at the gynecologist smelling like cigarettes and wearing yesterday's clothes.
PANTIES FOUND
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