dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He asked me what I wanted the cake to say and I then asked him if "I'm sorry for throwing up in your bed last night" was too long. He said it was...
also dude totally apologize for the whole drunken "want something in my mouth" text
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
blew off easter dinner with the fam to go play shot roulette. woke up in nothing but my boxers in the back of a random pickup truck.
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want my paycheck, and my friends. And alcohol and tacos. Is that so much to ask?
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
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