Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
I had 4 margarita's and 2 mixed drinks and i blew zero's. Its a cinco de mayo miracle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i remember you telling me to take a shower, brush my teeth, go get back in bed w her, and "just do what i was born to do." and as soon as i stopped yacking i did just that. you saved my birthday.
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
I'M MAKING HIKING PLANS WITH THE GIRL WHO IS DATING MY EX, THAT IS PERSONAL FUCKING GROWTH
I'm spending tomorrow doing taxes and making jello shots. Is this adulthood?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
I just bought a blender and 120 pizza rolls. Bring tequila.
I'm not going to tell you how to live your life, which includes naming your schlong
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize