so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
We are two peas in an std pod
Grandma just handed out bail money... it's officially christmas
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
Guess what I'm doing tonight? Tacos and strip chess.
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
People were staring and acting all judgmental and offended... Like they've never seen anyone breastfeed in a liquor store.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her mom is a nurse who got called in to declare someone dead. Just got wing manned by a corpse.
Does it still count as a valentine if it's drunk phone sex at 3 in the morning
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
Im sober enough to understand what people are saying but drunk enough to understand its hilarious
Randomize