South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
so he was shitfaced and kept using sticky notes to label everything like "beer spill" and "going to fuck later"
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's in bed with me right now. I'm wearing a towel and all I could wish for is my freedom. And pizza.
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
I've been smelling a baby wipe for three minutes. I didn't think I was that drunk but I guess I am
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
COVER ME IN BACON THATS MY FETISH
ACTUALLY ITS NOT, I HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA WHAT AWAKENS THE MONSTER BELOW THE BELT
Question: have you ever spent your Tuesday evening helping your one-night-stand create a resume? Because I have...
There comes a point where there's just condoms and old mcdonalds in your garbage can and you can't tell if you've won or lost.
I'm disproportionately drunk. But I also spelled disproportionately right twice so maybe I'm not that drunk
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