once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
Sooo, his balls are like... bigger than my head...
dude sorry about putting my finger in your butt last nite i was wasted and thought it was mine
i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
I felt like a fire hydrant the vomit just kept coming out
where's my purse there's an important taco in it
We got a Christmas tree, decorated it to surprise his wife And kids who were out of town for her father's funeral, then fucked like rabbits on their new mattress before he had to pick them up at the airport.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just had to throw up on the floor of my car during traffic on the way to work. Car next to me saw both times. Found the downside to having a job right after graduation.
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
I'm going to fake an anxiety attack to get to the front of the line. Save me some brisket.
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
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