drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
Just saw a bouncer shoot a stripper with a squirt gun. He looked at me n said,"gotta keep em in check." I'm in love with this place
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
Oh you have a half-brother? Why that's right up my alley! Let's cause family strife
Tearing families apart since 2011.
Mass text to all of my back up boy toys. First one here wins. Mama needs some.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
How do you say, "I love you, but i prefer sex with someone else." in a good way? Ponder that over a jack and coke and get back to me.
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
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