By the way the fattest man alive got married yesterday and I don't even have a boyfriend.
If I had a nickel for every time somebody called me a bad person I would have enough money to check into rehab
I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
and the award for most disgusting thing ever done on my couch now officially goes to you! Congratulations, you won the couch...I can't even look at it anymore.
Did you really just text me at 6:35 in the morning asking where the condoms were? I moved out a year ago.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
At first I was a little embarrassed for sharting, but then i realized it was a bachelor party, and I went balls to the wall
Surely the maintenance men have seen worse than that condom right
Like an undercooked grilled cheese that got cold again. But hairy.
And there goes my desire for sandwiches. Forever.
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
drunk boyfriend and drunk me are NOT meant for each other
Randomize