question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
can't come out tonight. went to the bar again last night and the bartender hugged and thanked me so much for my "generosity." I'm intrigued but terrified to see my credit card bill.
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just picked them up. It took 6 holes and a handle of rum to evolve from golf to a demolition derby.
There's an entire pit crew of cart boys surveying the golf cart destruction.
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
Im pretty sure by the fifth subway ride after going in circles the four times prior, we all just accepted that we werent making the concert and should instead enjoy our magical weed and tequila laced journey.
Dude, did you know, your blood is contaminated with over 17 non-beer fluids?
Yeah. I don't know. I'm just gonna show up at her place on valentines day with a jock strap, box of chocolates, and rose clenched between my ass cheeks with "be mine" written across my glorious man titties.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I just got drunk texted by my psychiatrist
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
You chipped your front tooth on the toilet bowl. Should I call your dentist?
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