It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
I just spent the past twenty minutes checking out a girl who turned out to be a mannequin. I need AA.
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
You know what's fun. When your getting a new mattress and you forget you put your vibrator under your old mattress and the moving guy finds it
Why does my therapist keep calling when I jerk off?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
Our prom king just sent me a dick pic. I know it's 10 years later but I feel like I've finally made it.
I had to switch to male Siri because I could feel female Siri voice judging me for reading my sexts out loud. Also, the dude voice keeps me in the mood.
Had dinner with a married woman but didn't have sex with her. Tweeted at Mike Pence to apologize anyway.
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
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