i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
Woman walking into toby keith concert: 8 months pregnant, black eye, shirt on that has a picture of a boot and the words "we'll put a boot up your ass" with an american flag printed over--the sleeves were ripped off and she had a camo cowboy hat. Greatest thing I've ever seen.
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
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I found him in the livingroom trying to soak up broken glass with the clock from the kitchen.
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
She wants to practice her harmonica skills on my penis
I'm getting turned down for sex. Apparently my "sexual appetite" cannot be satiated even by a man who's such a deviant he went to prison for jerking off in his car.
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Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
Passing out drunk in my therapists lobby may not be the best way to confirm my "stability"
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
Two old ladies openly mocked me this morning at drunk breakfast. Is it time to reevaluate my life choices?
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
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