I had a dream that I had 21 friend requests. it was the best day
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah. I stopped her before she flashed the guy for a free slice of pizza. She called me a gentleman and then before I knew it she was in my bed.
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
I may have just poured a honey apple beer onto a dried apple slice to rehydrate it. This is my day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
okay yeah but you've seen me eat jambalaya naked
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
All I've had to eat today are potatoes...and by that I mean vodka and chips
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
The dick lei will go down in squad history
Not going to make it tonight. Some cougar at the bar just told me she has dibs on my dick.
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