You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
If you don't come out tonight, who's going to wake us up in the morning because they're fucking in the middle of the room where everyones sleeping?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
There was definitely a significant amount of cookie dough in my bra
I went on my dinner date pretending that my lunch date didn't jizz in my hair.
The less money I spend on drugs, the happier my mom will be.
Well would you like to come over anyway? I will be wearing sweatpants and disappointment. Also, I have Jack Daniels and I've managed to get drunk in under half an hour. But my boobs look awesome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The rest of the concert I just stared at the lights and didn't really listen to the music cuz I was trying to make sure my brain still worked cuz my face was numb and I couldn't move... Yeah I'm not a weed brownie person
Last night I was this close to hooking up with someone called "Handjob Pat" dubbed for the time he paid $150 for a handjob in Canada.
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
Hey buddy, turns out those were the PB&shroomwiches, soooo you may want to reconsider dinner with your girlfriends family tonight...
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
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