I wish there were whore gnomes that cleaned our apartment when we were gone.
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
I intend to get homeless drunk
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
I never thought your mom would see me throwing up on my hands and knees in your front yard
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
Pretty sure I sang "What Makes You Beautiful" to some random guy in a parking lot last night...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't wait till we are old and wrinkly and I can turn to you and ask, "Remember when you Rick Jamesed the shit out of that couch??"
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
Hold on, I need to find something to wear that says "I don't contribute to your daughter's drug problem"
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
Randomize