Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
So Jesus turned water into wine. So what? I once turned a whole student loan into natty light. Your move holy man.
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
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She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
You were Q-tipping mashed potatoes out of your ear.
It was a sobriety test blowjob. If he could get it up, he could get me home.
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
I'm fucking a man old enough to be my father who is also dating my boss. What have you done with your life?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was stuffing my vagina with gummy bears last night having him eat them out of me. Team Haribo for the win!
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
I knew I wanted to marry her when we got in that bar fight and she full-nelsoned a guy while I worked his kidneys. I knew then we had to breed
Can’t fucking wait for Tuesday night. Have another situation that popped up. I swear my life is like a cross between a soap opera and a porno
My one night stand from last weekend is now taking me on a date this weekend. How is this my life?
I smell like beef jerky
That's among the sexiest things you've ever said to me.
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