Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
peeing is so easy when youre drunk. you just tell your body to pee and it pees.
Hows this for an invention: a toilet that weighs your poop
he started yelling "squirt for me" then his girlfriend knocked on the door and told us to keep it down
i'm not really understanding how she couldn't figure out it was him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
i just got offered coke by a strung out pilot. my night just got a lot more interesting.
She bought a fucking hedgehog. And that's just the tip of the crazy iceberg.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Warning: at some point today you will probably see several pics of me 69-ing a blow up turtle show up on facebook. Just disregard them.
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
I think I had Hypothermia but was too drunk to notice.
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
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