Packed at 6 am completely wasted. Damage assessment: 12 pairs of socks (no underwear), a flashlight, 3 shorts, shot glass, 8 sweaters, puff paint, one sneaker.
don't worry about the neighbors I'm like 99% sure all that snow covered a good portion of our vomit
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
Apparently I whispered "Jesus was here" and bailed out of the moving taxi.
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's asking if he can send a dick pic. How do I politely decline that?
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
I'm sorry I was just sleeping on the kitchen floor I'm too dead to think
I just ate the lyft drivers bacon cheeseburger. Well fuck me this night escalated quickly.
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