we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
why is there a handicap sign in the bathtub and an exit sign in the kitchen?
lets deal with that after we figure out where i am
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
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Just saw him riding in a basket on the front of a bike trying to feed the other guy beer. He screamed 'PARTY BIKE BITCHES!' at me as they rode past.
I lied. He's hitting on a drag queen now. Should I rescue him or take pictures?
Apparently I blacked out and pissed all over the sliding glass door from the inside, as everyone watched from the outside helplessly....
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
Everytime I get drunk I wake up hugging the bag of bagels from three months ago
So I got this new job… ever been fucked in a corner office before?
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
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