My cock was attacked by outdoor plants
I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
eating toast while peeing. You think this what kanye meant by the good life?
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
my mom asked if I found my Easter basket. it's 1PM & I got home an hour ago from last night. if I'm looking for anything, it's my dignity.
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
I just made the most “single life” Amazon order ever: protein bars and condoms.
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize