I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
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Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
I poured everyones drinks into the ice bucket and then stuck my face in it. Apparently I'm a greedy drunk.
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
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I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
He called me at 4am to ask me to marry him, then threw up into the phone for 10 minutes.
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
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