A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
drunk at some random house party. come get me. i thought i pulled my dick out to go piss... it was my left nut. im soaked.
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
you broke a plate. told her her wedding china was ugly and you were doing her a favor. then proceeded to break every plate you could get your hands on.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
I arrived home at 7am wearing nothing but my underwear and a fedora. I ate half a dozen deviled eggs. Put Katy Perry on repeat. And cried myself to sleep. We cannot go out on Thursday anymore
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fuck you, I'm yelling at a mountain right now
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
lol hangovers are for mortals.
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
I broke my wrist trying to give him a blow job...
And this is why we can’t have nice things
He fucked me while I was smoking his blunt. His apartment was trashed and he drives a van that looks like it’s been hit by a train but still 10/10 would fuck again.
Randomize