I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My dream of liquor pitchers came true
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
That reminds me of that one time you handcuffed me to a table leg while I was reaching for the vodka.
I just wanna go somewhere and not be judged for wearing spandex shorts that make my ass look like a slice of fucking heaven. Is that so much to ask??
Dying on my bathroom floor at 7 am, I would rather be eaten by a shark right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
I had to say goodbye to one of my fuck buddies last night. He's voting for Trump, we shouldn't be doing it anyways.
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
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