I will make out with the first guy who tries to pick me up with a lyric from a rap song. I won't even reply, just be on him like whoa.
My vag should have a twitter account. It would be like "destroyed another condom today".
i purposely bought her a small sweater. My way of saying, you've gotten fat.
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
I just sent him 3 long ass texts about how to tell a girl how he feels. I should get a fucking friend zone medal.
I will make you one.
Good. It needs "forever alone" engraved on it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The extent of "getting it in" was this creepy guy sticking his finger in my bellybutton
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
Is it sad the checkout lady had to inform my mom she can't buy alcohol before 8am?
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
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