I'll pay for our taxi if you let me makeout with the drummer and we don't leave RIGHT when the bassist does.
I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
Just saw a cop issuing a DUI. At 3 pm. It's definitely the start of winter break.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He just asked me to pee through my panties while he watched. I might need more tequila for this one.
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
I can't keep up with all the guys you're banging. I'm just going to start referring to them by city of origin.
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
They were supposed to legalize it when there was a chance someone might actually propose to me. I'm appealing this bullshit.
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