she called my cock the "semen sword" and then we invented a position called excalibur
Ive given up on my natural charms. Im trying different accents till some girl wants to hook up with me.
We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
It's George Washington's Birthday. Can you not put on some red white and blue and get really drunk for the original Merican??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
Liar. My heart is broken and my boobs are disappointed.
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
Memeber that time you got detained in Poland. We don’t talk about that enough
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
Randomize