I think I just saw the silver monkey from legends of the hidden temple sitting out in someone's trash
GO. BACK. NOW.
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
This is how we made chicken soup last night: Whole chicken in a pot of vodka with a box of crackers and some carrots. We should go pro.
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
and a jello shot exploded in my bra last night. Now I have blueberry smurfette boobs. Awesome.
He thought my hair would soak it up. I HAD TO CUT IT OFF.
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
Currently sifting through all the dick pics and nudes for a picture of my dad and I to post on social media for Father's Day...
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
Dear Ex-Sister-in-Law, I never thought I would say this, but I just found your panties in my back seat. Please remind me to give them back.
Left my wallet at the store. Wouldn't have noticed if the joint I just rolled wasn't in it.
Randomize