sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
not my fault. i got her to believe he wrote an oasis song. he still managed to find a way to make sure no girl ever gets near his penis.
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
Dude it was a mini horse. It obviously only eats mini things.
I forgot my id and a man called soup is buying me vodka.
look at his last status update. 3:41 a.m. "i love u and miss u already egg burrito. happy trails friend." OF COURSE HE SMOKES POT.
I was in the bathroom puking up mountains of tequila and when he came to help me, I held the door shut and kept yelling at him to let me be a lady.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
At 27 it's no longer called 'slutty', it's called having a healthy sex life...
Well would you like to come over anyway? I will be wearing sweatpants and disappointment. Also, I have Jack Daniels and I've managed to get drunk in under half an hour. But my boobs look awesome.
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
We were in the uber and you were crying because you wanted to be an Olympic gymnast. The driver tried to console you and you just cried harder
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
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