I'm still drunk from last night...I walked out for a cigarette with one of the Janitors here and apparently someone took a shit on the stairs...Which makes me wonder...was that me?
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
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He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
The problem is drunk me is completely unaware how poor I am
C'mon. I'm still an alcoholic at heart, regardless of its broken or not
I SHIT YOU NOT a mailman helped me leave without waking him up.
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
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Shit my boyfriend's roommate thinks thinks: I love getting woken up to the sound of my roommate getting a blowjob
I'm so jealous of your sex life. You know it's awesome when thinking about the sex you had last night brings you tears of joy.
Had a dream I was doing scat with Caroline. I need to lay off the cheese at night
Why is no one on Snapchat tonight? I want to see other people having fun so I know it still exists.
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
I see more hoeing in ur future
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