I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
highlight from tonight: i hit on her and her mother.
you know your drunk when 7 soccer players cant catch up to a tranny in high heels who just stole your wallet
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No I'm not proud of you for not sleeping with him. He has herpes. You don't get a gold star for behaving how you're expected to. Trust me. I'm a teacher.
I don't even know. I woke up to a text from someone named Vick saying he was 'legit worried' that I had herpes.
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
Dude I swear I'm scooping human shit out of the litter boxes. What the fuck happened last night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Stupid adulating
Yeah it sucks, but at least I can buy wine so it all comes out in the wash
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
He eats ass but won’t hold open doors. My kinda guy.
Chivalry really is dead.
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
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