you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
We left an ass print on the piano.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
Saw my boss's vagina at that party. Hung over at work has never been more acceptable
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
Okay! I've got my sketchbook, my purse, my coat, and a knife hidden in my cleavage. I'm ready for to meet my blind date~
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
He stopped in the middle of us having sex and asked "is today Monday?" then went even faster
Where are you? Your parents are here. Their flight got in early.
Trashy Tequila Tuesdays. Have them meet me here @ the bar.
I'm not sending your parents to see you drunk at a gay bar. What kind of boyfriend do you think I am?
A great one. Entertain them i'll be home soon....... I think
She complimented my boobs and then told me I smelled like teddy bears before falling asleep on the floor.
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
Randomize