when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your dignity remains intact. He, on the other hand, is completely convinced he slept with your cat.
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
Really, thanks for buying me caribou, it helped me out. Today will forever be the day I threw up in a caribou cup in the skyway outside of chipotle.
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
I'm drinking and making muffins and I believe this is why God put us on earth.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The more I think about it, the more convinced I am that I'm the solution to all of T-Swift's guy problems.
I texted him in the morning wishing him a day as spectacular as his dick was.
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
Basic items
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
Randomize