a creepy fucking ass man came up and started raven cawwing in my ear... he said it was the raven mating call. i am officially freaked out
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
Swear to god this chicks brother got let out of jail for the weekend for the sole purpose of cock blocking me
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
Hey its me your friend who impressed the pharmacist by already knowing the generic version of plan b by name
To the person who put the glitter on my ceiling fan...fuck you
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean.. listen to "Put It In My Mouth" and you'll get the gist of my voicemail for you.
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
Saw 2 lesbians fist fighting outside the bar tonight. I was startled yet slightly turned on
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
Accidentally texted co-worker instead of bf “I’m wfh tomrw. Nooner? 💦”
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