Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
She rode me to the beat of Baby Got Back. I swear to god.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just got fired from my job because i was "too smart" and my immedate response was i am WAY too stoned to be considered smart, and theni walked out the door.
wow. i have no words.
Dude, I just scraped frozen vomit from my rooftop
I really wish I could say this is a new low for you
I just saw the Mona Lisa in the background of a porno. Whole new appreciation for art. fuck you I'm cultured.
Do you remember using the vicegrip to demonstrate how wide your penis is?
I swear if you get so drunk that I have to sing Bohemian Rhapsody to you again to get you to come out of the bathroom I'm leaving you at the bar this time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
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