her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
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I barely even remember him. He is just a distant beard in my past.
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
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Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
I came home to him frying bacon to put in his beer. He said bacon beer lights, taste the awesomer rockies
who knew tequila and Christmas cookies would go so well together
There's not really an emoticon that says "I'm sorry I honked your boobs, and that you weren't a fan of that."
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
I love you man but my hope is that you will not wake me up again by pissing on me
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