So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
either way he was missing a nipple.
who knew that a girl that let me piss on her within 20 minutes of meeting her would get upset i couldn't remember her name.
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
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I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
I just realised I've never been sober in my apartment
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
we are all four or five tequila-induced decisions away from shitting in a bucket, come get me please.
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I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
After so many times of carrying your puked covered clothes home in a bag on a Tuesday morning, you begin to realize that Fucked Up Mondays aren't a real thing.
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
So, I gotta figure when the nurses at the emergency room noticed my new hair cut it means I'm there too often, right?
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
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