dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches
We had literally Just finished having sex when he handed me a plan B and said he lied about wearing a condom.
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
if you want blown tonight you're gonna have to take me up on that offer now. in less then 45 minutes you're gonna be blacked out and i'm not doing something i'm not getting credit for in the morning.
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
My mom said she saw you at the bar last night and asked how you were. She said, you replied with, "Oh you know, just knocked up."
Figured I'd get right to the point
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At some point, you're going to have to talk to a tree and do what it says
I just projectile vomited into my kitchen sink. Today need to be over already.
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
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