Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
Hemmingway ran to paris to avoid going to the university of illinois and becoming a doctor. It was there he developed a drinking problem. I need a plane ticket.
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's like you don't even want to get drunk with me everyday, anymore.
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
Let me start this apology by saying I'm sorry that I bit your penis.
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
we're gonna read the declaration of independence and do a shot for every word he doesn't understand.
This may be the most redneck thing I've ever said, but I know all there is to know about farting dogs
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