So when jo picked me up from the bar I kept apologizing and kept telling her "I'm just a wittle donut"
then my best friend's brother, boyfriend, and future bro in law showed up at the bar. they asked who i was there with. didn't know if "a 40 year old man" or "my 5th grade teacher" was better answer.
At lowes after workin outside. Kid behind me says "mommy that man smells like a taco" yes she was talking about me.
then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
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She is sleeping in a dress because she's too drunk to put "real clothes" on
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
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Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
Its 6:30pm and dad just drunk called me asking me what the alarm code at home is..... I'm at home, and dad isn't here.....
I went next door to get a can opener from them. They opened the door shirtless, asked me if I wanted to a smoke a joint with them. Then decided to make blueberry smoothies. But the yogurt in the blender & the berries, got confused when the berries blended into the yogurt and just kept adding more. Only stopped when we ran out of berries.
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