I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
woke up next to her writing my name in some journal. apparently she makes every guy she hooks up with sign out.
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
Theres a handprint of sauce on my frig, one streaked across my face, a trail of it to my bedroom and sauce all in my bed and i have no idea what the fuck i ate.
He told me I was a pleasure to arrest. That's the 2nd time I've heard that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
This is what my life has come to. Drinking champagne alone yelling at the dog because no one wants to hang out with me
It was like a Thanksgiving meal, which you spend 8 hours cooking, and the family wolfs down in 20 minutes. All that flirting and build-up for like 90 seconds of pumping and he was gone in a flash, never to be heard from again.
Yeah, reverse cow girl. She was on top and I was playing Flappy Bird behind her back. Easiest way to have angry sex.
Do you think my laundromat will notice that the bloodstain on my sheets is in the shape of a face?
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
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