This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
new hobby: convincing random sorority girls around campus that we hooked up last weekend. i'm 2 for 5.
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
While we were having sex he told me "this is what you get for not parking my car right" I have never drove his car. He was that kind of weird.
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
I knew my sister shouldn't have gone to the bacherlotte party. Two of the other brides maids have black eyes and my fiancé called me and asked if this is the crazy she's marrying
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
Hey. Did I get punched in the face last night?
Yeah. I told you I would and you didn't believe me.
Randomize