fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sunday is a myth, I refuse to believe that I waste an entire day unable to function after a night of drinking.
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
Im not coming back to that place until im drunk. If I walk in there sober Ill start screaming uncontrollably. Not words, just sounds.
Had a guy offer me a shot. But he wimped out when I asked for tequila and instead ordered gummi bear shots. I don't think he has balls. I didn't stick around to find out.
dude you literally had like 30 screwdrivers, i thought you were gonna die
that explains why my vomit smells like it came from florida
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
Holy shit, we're married as fuck.
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
I woke up with pitch black feet and crushed doritos around my mouth. That's how I determined how my night went
I felt the need to set off fireworks in the living room while they were having sex upstairs. Yes, they quieted down.
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